Don't Forget you are a Shining Star

Hi, friends I am hereby posting a speech forwarded to me by one of my friends. It's an "Inaugural Speech by Chetan Bhagat for the new batch at the Symbiosis BBA program 2008".

There are few days in human life when one is truly elated. The first day in college is one of them. When you were getting ready today, you felt a tingling in your stomach. What would the auditorium be like, what would the teachers be like, who are my new classmates - there is so much to be curious about. I call this excitement, the spark within you that makes you feel truly alive today. Today I am going to talk about keeping the spark shining. Or to put it another way, how to be happy most, if not all the time.

Where do these sparks start? I think we are born with them. My 3-year old twin boys have a million sparks. A little Spiderman toy can make them jump on the bed. They get thrills from creaky swings in the park. A story from daddy gets them excited. They do a daily countdown for birthday party – several months in advance – just for the day they will cut their own birthday cake.

I see students like you, and I still see some sparks. But when I see older people, the spark is difficult to find. That means as we age, the spark fades. People whose spark has faded too much are dull, dejected, aimless and bitter. Remember Kareena in the first half of Jab We Met vs the second half? That is what happens when the spark is lost. So how to save the spark?

Imagine the spark to be a lamp's flame. The first aspect is nurturing - to give your spark the fuel, continuously. The second is to guard against storms.

To nurture, always have goals. It is human nature to strive, improve and achieve full potential. In fact, that is success. It is what is possible for you. It isn't any external measure - a certain cost to company pay package, a particular car or house.

Most of us are from middle class families. To us, having material landmarks is success and rightly so. When you have grown up where money constraints force everyday choices, financial freedom is a big achievement.

But it isn't the purpose of life. If that was the case, Mr Ambani would not show up for work. Shah Rukh Khan would stay at home and not dance anymore. Steve Jobs won't be working hard to make a better iPhone, as he sold Pixar for billions of dollars already. Why do they do it? What makes them come to work everyday?

They do it because it makes them happy. They do it because it makes them feel alive. Just getting better from current levels feels good. If you study hard, you can improve your rank. If you make an effort to interact with people, you will do better in interviews. If you practice, your cricket will get better. You may also know that you cannot become Tendulkar, yet. But you can get to the next level. Striving for that next level is important.

Nature designed with a random set of genes and circumstances in which we were born. To be happy, we have to accept it and make the most of nature's design. Are you? Goals will help you do that.


I must add, don't just have career or academic goals. Set goals to give you a balanced, successful life. I use the word balanced before successful. Balanced means ensuring your health, relationships, mental peace are all in good order.

There is no point of getting a promotion on the day of your breakup. There is no fun in driving a car if your back hurts. Shopping is not enjoyable if your mind is full of tensions.

You must have read some quotes - Life is a tough race, it is a marathon or whatever. No, from what I have seen so far, life is one of those races in nursery school. Where you have to run with a marble in a spoon kept in your mouth. If the marble falls, there is no point coming first. Same with life, where health and relationships are the marble. Your striving is only worth it if there is harmony in your life. Else, you may achieve the success, but this spark, this feeling of being excited and alive, will start to die.

One last thing about nurturing the spark - don't take life seriously. One of my yoga teachers used to make students laugh during classes. One student asked him if these jokes would take away something from the yoga practice. The teacher said - don't be serious, be sincere. This quote has defined my work ever since. Whether its my writing, my job, my relationships or any of my goals. I get thousands of opinions on my writing everyday. There is heaps of praise, there is intense criticism. If I take it all seriously, how will I write? Or rather, how will I live? Life is not to be taken seriously, as we are really temporary here. We are like a pre-paid card with limited validity. If we are lucky, we may last another 50 years. And 50 years is just 2,500 weekends. Do we really need to get so worked up? It's ok, bunk a few classes, goof up a few interviews, fall in love. We are people, not programmed devices.

I've told you three things - reasonable goals, balance and not taking it too seriously that will nurture the spark. However, there are four storms in life that will threaten to completely put out the flame. These must be guarded against. These are disappointment, frustration, unfairness and loneliness of purpose.

Disappointment will come when your effort does not give you the expected return. If things don't go as planned or if you face failure. Failure is extremely difficult to handle, but those that do come out stronger. What did this failure teach me? is the question you will need to ask. You will feel miserable. You will want to quit, like I wanted to when nine publishers rejected my first book. Some IITians kill themselves over low grades – how silly is that? But that is how much failure can hurt you.

But it's life. If challenges could always be overcome, they would cease to be a challenge. And remember - if you are failing at something, that means you are at your limit or potential. And that's where you want to be.

Disappointment's cousin is frustration, the second storm. Have you ever been frustrated? It happens when things are stuck. This is especially relevant in India. From traffic jams to getting that job you deserve, sometimes things take so long that you don't know if you chose the right goal. After books, I set the goal of writing for Bollywood, as I thought they needed writers. I am called extremely lucky, but it took me five years to get close to a release.

Frustration saps excitement, and turns your initial energy into something negative, making you a bitter person. How did I deal with it? A realistic assessment of the time involved – movies take a long time to make even though they are watched quickly, seeking a certain enjoyment in the process rather than the end result – at least I was learning how to write scripts , having a side plan – I had my third book to write and even something as simple as pleasurable distractions in your life - friends, food, travel can help you overcome it. Remember, nothing is to be taken seriously. Frustration is a sign somewhere, you took it too seriously.

Unfairness - this is hardest to deal with, but unfortunately that is how our country works. People with connections, rich dads, beautiful faces, pedigree find it easier to make it – not just in Bollywood, but everywhere. And sometimes it is just plain luck. There are so few opportunities in India, so many stars need to be aligned for you to make it happen. Merit and hard work is not always linked to achievement in the short term, but the long term correlation is high, and ultimately things do work out. But realize, there will be some people luckier than you.

In fact, to have an opportunity to go to college and understand this speech in English means you are pretty darn lucky by Indian standards. Let's be grateful for what we have and get the strength to accept what we don't. I have so much love from my readers that other writers cannot even imagine it. However, I don't get literary praise. It's ok. I don't look like Aishwarya Rai, but I have two boys who I think are more beautiful than her. It's ok. Don't let unfairness kill your spark.

Finally, the last point that can kill your spark is isolation. As you grow older you will realize you are unique. When you are little, all kids want Ice cream and Spiderman. As you grow older to college, you still are a lot like your friends. But ten years later and you realize you are unique. What you want, what you believe in, what makes you feel, may be different from even the people closest to you. This can create conflict as your goals may not match with others. . And you may drop some of them. Basketball captains in college invariably stop playing basketball by the time they have their second child. They give up something that meant so much to them. They do it for their family. But in doing that, the spark dies. Never, ever make that compromise. Love yourself first, and then others.

There you go. I've told you the four thunderstorms - disappointment, frustration, unfairness and isolation. You cannot avoid them, as like the monsoon they will come into your life at regular intervals. You just need to keep the raincoat handy to not let the spark die.

Hi, all I am hereby posting a nice post from times of india. Hope you will consider it seriously for your health.

While we all use the computer with absolute abandon, very few of us actually stop to consider the health hazards this all-powerful machine possesses.

They are the lifeline for every individual today. Ultra-sleek, very light, designer colours with fancy brand names, and some of the species being portable; most of us cannot begin to comprehend life without the personal computer (PC).

Though it is now an established norm that we need to spend at least 8-10 hours on the computer everyday to earn our daily bread, very few of us consider the health hazards which are omnipresent when it comes to using either a PC or a laptop.

While the common and banal danger of eyestrain exists, there is also the ever-increasing spate of orthopedic problems and all of a sudden, an entire stream of undocumented psychological problems that have started creeping into the lives of computer users.

Mind over matter

Mental problems are the latest in the range of health hazards we can attribute to the computer. From addictions to suicide bids, the simple lack of a PC can be the signal for pure desperation.

It seems our productivity, number of friends and indeed existence is directly proportional to the number of hours we spend glued to the workstation, staring at the screen and pecking away at the keyboard.

Dr Laura Vaz, clinical psychologist and psychoanalyst, cites the example of a young girl who attempted suicide twice when her parents took away the modem of her computer. “The basic problem is that people do not really see the computer for what it is -- a tool. They see it as a crutch to solve all their difficulties and also as a means of escaping reality,” opines Dr Vaz.

However, there is no real solution to the above problems. It is more a question of inculcating the correct habits early on. “When children just begin to use the computer, they should be taught to see it as nothing more than a tool, and should be taught the correct attitude towards using a computer,” advises Dr Vaz.

For adults who are addicted to the computer, there is no other solution save for psychological therapy and treatment for their addiction. The treatment is similar to the treatment given to drug and alcohol addicts.

Watchout your back

While this piece of advice is generally doled out to those who are in the line of fire, it would not go amiss for anyone who’s using a computer either. And while you’re watching your back, you might consider watching your neck, shoulders, elbows, wrists, thighs and even feet as well.

Other common orthopaedic problems seen in computer users are wrist pain, elbow pain, and shoulder pain. “These injuries are caused due to incorrect support to the joints,” elaborates Dr Shreedhar Archik, joint replacement specialist, Lilavati and Shushrusha hospitals Archik.

“A good posture for computer use contains three 90-degree angles. The torso is perpendicular to the thighs, which are perpendicular to the legs, which are perpendicular to the feet,” explains Dr Archik.

In order to avoid an RSI of the wrist (Carpal-Tunnel Syndrome), consider getting an attachable wrist board for your keyboard, and use a mouse pad that contains a wrist support. This will ensure proper padding for your wrists, which will provide it with the correct support.

Keep an eye out

Viewing data on a computer screen is different than viewing a typewritten or printed page. The letters on a computer screen are not as precise or sharply defined, the level of contrast is reduced and the presence of glare and reflections on the screen may make viewing more difficult.

This results in eye problems, the most common hazard of using a computer. “All problems of the eyes associated with using the computer can be clubbed under the Computer Vision Syndrome (CVS),” says Dr Cyres K Mehta, consultant ophthalmic surgeon and director, Masina Hospital. Symptoms of CVS include headaches, blurred vision, neck pain, fatigue, eye strain, dry, irritated eyes, and difficulty refocusing the eyes. CVS generally occurs because we don’t give our eyes enough rest while staring at the screen, and also do not blink at regular intervals, to lubricate the eye.

According to Dr Mehta, there is a simple five point programme you should follow in order to make sure you don’t suffer from CVS.

The monitor should be kept below the eye level, more than 14 inches away from the eye, with the brightness adjusted to a tolerable level. It is also better to use an LCD rather than a CRT monitor. You should blink frequently to lubricate your eyes.

You should also use artificial tears to supplement the lubricating effect of blinking. The monitor should be positioned in such a way that there is minimal fluorescent lighting (from tube lights) reflecting off the screen. This reflection of fluorescent light causes difficulty in focussing and therefore eyestrain.

Exercising helps!

Fitness expert and back pain specialist, Mehernaaz Damania recommends the following exercises to avoid being plagued by back and neck pain while using the computer. This set of exercises should be repeated at half-hourly intervals.

Turn your neck from side to side at moderate speed 4-5 times. Tilt your head to one side till your ear touches your shoulder, straighten, and repeat on the other side. Do this at moderate speed 4-5 times. Roll your shoulders first clockwise and then anticlockwise 4-5 times at moderate speed. To loosen your lower back, sit on a chair, bend forwards and let your body and neck hang loose.

If possible, sit on a Swiss ball and bounce gently every few minutes. Sit upright with your elbow at a 90 degree angle and your forearms touching each other in front of your face. Open your arms to expand the chest and stretch the chest and shoulders. Repeat 5-6 times.

Stand up and bend sideways from the waist left and right. Repeat 5-6 times. Damania also recommends getting up every 15-20 minutes and taking a short walk to loosen the body.

Reference : Times of India